~Lumos~
Hey, guys! How have you been?
Sorry it’s been a while. I’ve been too busy but now it’s Christmas break (whoooo) so I’d be able to do 3 blog posts in two weeks (maybe).
So in my previous posts, you might have noticed that it’s all about my thoughts on something with just a hint of experience so now, I’m going to talk about my experiences.
First of these will be, as you have already guessed from the title, my social life. So without further ado,
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I wasn’t that much active as a very young child.
I probably was one of those kids who loves to participate in class activities because all I knew it could help me gain friends, but whenever it’s playtime, I don’t usually ask my classmates if I could play with them, so I just stay in a corner until they call me to join them.
It was probably because I spent my first 4 years mostly at home with my parents, grandmother, nanny and our collection of dolls. [I even remember one time at a school day when I woke up early and found that my mother was about to go to work and I chased her down to the corner of our street crying because I want to go with her but before I caught up, my father took me back to our house and scolded me there. My mother returned and swore that if I finished taking a bath, she would bring me to work. Turns out she lied, as when I was about to enter the bedroom to wear clothes, she was already gone.]
Well, I did play with our neighbors who are of the same age as I am when I was younger, along with my sisters, but I’m guessing that we aren’t just as good in the games they play so we just stay at one side and watch them do their thing.
Anyways, it was because I didn’t really know how to fit in even as a four-year-old, and this would be my case up until later on.
New school, new environment.
You do know the feeling of being a new kid, like no one (I mean no one) is familiar to you, yeah? That’s what I felt when I was 5, when I transferred from a day care center to a private school. Just imagine a little kid who already knows that feeling.
I was the new kid in our class. Everyone else has been there since the previous year, so it makes all of them friends, while I have to struggle finding new ones.
Even though my dad is there until dismissal, it was too much for me to take in: from just a small house-like classroom to a campus with multiple buildings; from a single class with 40 students from the [3-to-5 years range of age] to a real school consisting of 12 years, from the kindergarten to the high school curriculum.
On my first day, we were asked by our teacher to introduce ourselves in front of everyone, so I don’t really remember anything except when I was already done and I hurried back to my seat.
I did get a few friends throughout the year, and they we all share the same table. Other than them, the rest were already strangers.
It went on up to 3rd grade actually; my only friends are only those who are seated around me, but there were still times when I was invited to play with the others, and there were times when I mustered all the courage to join in.
Fourth Grade
It wasn’t until 4th grade when I started to become aware of what others think and how they actually behave. I had my first best friend, my first punishment, my first classmate who copied off my answers during and had a higher score than I did.
There was one time when we celebrated the language month and we were required to wear our national clothes during the celebration. They didn’t specify that only those in the 3rd grade and below should wear it whole day and those who are in the 4th grade and higher should just bring theirs and be in their school uniform for the first part of the program. So guess what?
I was the only person who’s older than eight years old wearing a dress for the whole morning. My teacher didn’t scold me because of it; it was one of my classmates who got mad at me due to that and I cried. I didn’t want to enter the gymnasium because of that. I had some classmates comfort me after and persuaded me to attend the program. [Shout out to my best friend who never left my side up until the end of the first part of the program.]
There was one time when our adviser had to rearrange out seats so I was separated from my best friend and sat beside a classmate of mine who was separated from her best friend. The difference between us was I was willing to make friends with others while she didn’t like the idea of being away from her best friend and she cried because of it. I wanted to comfort her but I was intimidated since she was easily the prettiest in the room (her best friend that time came closely second) and also because in a bad mood. She ended up being the one who cheated during a quiz in Mathematics and got a perfect score while I had one mistake (she ranked 6th in class at the end of the school year while I was ranked 9th).
There was also a time during break when her friends came to her seat to chat and she was holding a piece of paper (which contains the lyrics to My Humps by the Black Eyed Peas). I asked her if I could join in, and she caught me looking at the paper so she faced it away from me and said to me, “Sorry you’re not allowed because you’re too young.” All I did was slowly turn away and go back to staring out the window.
There were so many things that happened here that may cause elongate this post, so I’ll try to make another post regarding this year.
Sixth Grade Trauma
Nothing significant happened in 5th grade that affected my social life whatsoever, but it sure did get me in a surprise during sixth grade: I fractured my right ankle.
Yes, I fractured my right ankle because we played something (that involves jumping and requires balance, coordination and flexibility, the last which I don’t have) in the middle of the room and it happened because our PE teacher won’t allow us to do it outside where the ground is soft enough to play on.
It so happens that the second floor of where we were staying was being built and we were supposed to transfer there after it is finished.
Long story short, we weren’t able to because of me. I didn’t blame it on myself because I know that it wasn’t my fault that I got injured; I blamed it all on the stupid logic of letting us play in the room where there are higher chances of foot injury because of the tiled floor rather than outside on the mini field because of the chances that one of the administration will be going around the campus for inspection.
So remember that girl in 4th grade? Yeah, that one who became my seatmate. I heard from my sister that she was backstabbing me and she said that it was all my fault that we didn’t get to experience having classes on the second floor of the building.
Yep, that was the very moment I knew she won’t consider me as her friend, nor I her.
Before graduating, we had this tradition of making letters to each other about graduating, getting to high school and stuff right now. Well, I did get a few from my classmates, and of course one of them was from my best friend from 4th grade, but its contents wasn’t what I was expecting. It was about not being friends anymore because she already has her own group of best friends . I felt so bad about it I was about to cry because I just lost a best friend, and probably the only one I ever had throughout my life as an elementary student. I had had long chats with my other classmates but that’s that. It never got past to the stage where we could fool around together.
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So that was my social life until I was 11. Sorry if this post was a bit rushed. I just have so many other things to do.
Part 2 will be up anytime soon. Thank you for reading this crap of an entry. Have a happy christmas, guys!
~Nox~